Sonic The Comical Forum
by Aqua 007
Summary: Sonic and his friends got more than they bargained for on Base X


Sonic the Comical Forum: Legal Note Sonic and anything else Sega is not mine (I wish it were) nor is Nintendo. Anything else is mine, so HANDS OFF now enjoy!  
  
The Comical Sonic Forum: Chapter 1 (Scene: A desert very near to Hidden Base. Radical Highway music cues up. Sonic The Hedgehog and Shadow The Hedgehog were racing each other for fun. They were now the best of friends, even though they tried to kill each other at the end of Final Rush/Final Chase. They were both neck and neck when Shadow started speaking.)  
  
Shadow: You're a worthy racer Sonic...(Gets out a Chaos Emerald)...But I bet you can't do... ...THIS! (Uses Chaos Control to warp about 5.673421 miles ahead.)  
  
Sonic: I bet I (Gets out a fake Chaos Emerald) CAN! (Uses Chaos Control to warp right next to Shadow.)  
  
(The race continues while Hidden Base comes into view as well as a grind rail until Sonic trips over something, rolls through a pit of quicksand clearly messing up his hair, and banging his head on the base next to the door pressing an hourglass next to it. The door opens when Shadow jumps off the grind rail and runs into a computer room. Inside Miles "Tails" Prower and Dr Ivo Robotnik A.K.A Dr Eggman are at computer terminals on opposite ends of the room. Tails gives a menacing look to Eggman who gives a similar look to Tails. They look ready to lay into each other when...)  
  
Voice:(Like Tails') Cut. Cut! CUT!!  
  
(Scene: SonicFic Studios. Tails walks in, rather annoyed)  
  
Tails: Aqua I've told you a thousand times not to write that.  
  
(A squirtle with a long, shiny tail with a spike at the end, a crystal sword and a name badge saying "Author" walks in.)  
  
Aqua:(The author and founder of SonicFic.) What's wrong with it?  
  
Tails:(Brings out the script for this fan fic. Aqua looks as well.) That bit after the author's note gives Eggman and me a bad name. Could you please change it?  
  
Aqua:(Busy writing something) I think I've got something you might like.  
  
(Aqua shows Tails the piece of paper. Tails looks obviously impressed.)  
  
Tails: That is absolutely brilliant! Put it in the computer!  
  
(Aqua puts the piece of paper in the computer and starts to type commands. Tails leaves)  
  
Aqua: Ok. Restart fan fic to after author's note with replacement story.  
  
Computer: Affirmative. Restarting fan fic to after author's note with replacement story. Thank you for using Windows Fic. Have a nice day.  
  
(A swirling vortex appears and restarts the fan fic.)  
  
(Scene: Hidden Base. The story up to the author's note is the same, so Ill start from there. Tails and Eggman are also the best of friends.)  
  
Eggman: Hey Tails check this out.  
  
Tails: What?  
  
Eggman:(Gestures to the computer he's been working on) I know how to get Sonic in Super Smash Brothers Melee.  
  
Tails: How?  
  
Eggman: Beat Classic mode in less than three minutes on Very Hard without losing a life and getting the half-minute man bonus on every level except the Master Hand/s. If you do that, you then have to fight the Metal Sonic team. If you beat them then Sonic challenges you. If you win, he's yours.  
  
Tails:(Hesitates one second before speaking.) That isn't true is it Eggman?  
  
Eggman: Err, no. But that's not what I want to talk to you about.  
  
Tails: What about?  
  
Eggman: I know how Sonic tripped up during the race.  
  
Tails: How?  
  
Eggman:(Gestures to the computer ) Have a look at this.  
  
(Tails goes to have a look when Knuckles, Rouge, Tikal, Chaos Zero, Amy Rose, Metal Sonic, Gerald and Maria Robotnik, Omochao and the Chao Walkers enter the room. Shadow, who is already in the room, also comes to have a look.)  
  
Chao Walker: Awl? (Gets out Zap Laser.)  
  
Dark Chao Walker: Di di. (Gets out Dark Finish)  
  
Omochao: Please. Not here. Do it out side.  
  
(The Chao Walkers leave, but not without blowing Omochao up with a lock on missile. A few seconds after they leave, extreme violence is heard outside. Meanwhile, at the other side of the room, the other characters are looking at a big screen while Eggman types commands in a computer nearby. The camera zooms in on the screen, which shows Sonic and Shadow running until Sonic starts to trip. The footage then stops and the camera zooms in on Sonic's shoe and the truth comes to light.)  
  
Everybody:(Excluding Eggman and Sonic who's still knocked out.) WHA!!!???  
  
Gerald: Good lord! His shoelaces were untied!  
  
Amy: He has shoelaces!?  
  
Sonic:(Outside Hidden Base) Not normally, but SOMEBODY tampered with my shoes.  
  
(Sonic enters the room with sand where Shadow has red on.)  
  
Shadow: Who would do such a thing?  
  
Amy: Yeah, who?  
  
Sonic: How about, (Points at Tails) the wiz kid, the fox that thinks laces are better then Velcro.  
  
(Everyone stares at Tails, and then Rouge speaks up.)  
  
Rouge: We all know what the argument is, but answer this. What do we do about it?  
  
(Everyone ponders the question, and then Knuckles answers.)  
  
Knuckles: Call Jerry Springer?  
  
Eggman: That wouldn't work.  
  
Sonic: How about we go on the Message Board in Base X.  
  
Rouge: Base X? You mean the Gamecube-Powered Death Egg, Base X?  
  
Sonic: That's right. It's the home of violent debates and at least one fist fight every forum.  
  
Knuckles: That's a brilliant idea. Where did you get it?  
  
Sonic:(Gets out a piece of paper) This ad on the bottom of that hourglass I banged into. Hey Eggman, I didn't know that you bought the hourglasses from Sleeze 'n Eeze. (Shows Eggman the paper.)  
  
Eggman: All right you win. There was a sale on. If I bought twenty hourglasses, I got one hundred billion Omochao for free.  
  
Metal Sonic: So that's why there's so many Omochao around.  
  
Sonic: Right. So Eggman makes the e-mail and me, Tails, Shadow and Knuckles will go there and enter the forum.  
  
Eggman: Right.  
  
(Shadow and Knuckles leave)  
  
Sonic: Tails, can you make these Sonics? (Hands Tails a piece of paper)  
  
Tails. Okay.  
  
(Sonic leaves with the others. Tails looks at the piece of paper, and then leaves with Sonic and the others.)  
  
(Scene: Base X. The Death Star Theme is playing in the background. It shows Base X in orbit around the Earth. It then shows Mario in a room looking at a computer. Pipe Vault Theme is playing in the background.)  
  
Mario: Boring, boring, boring. (Sees he has a new forum) Yes! A new forum.  
  
(Mario jumps over the desk with his classic sound effect, looks at his map and walks out. On the way he encounters Bowser.)  
  
Mario: Hey Bowser.  
  
Bowser: Yes?  
  
Mario: Can you tell me where the lifts are?  
  
Bowser: The other side of the development room.  
  
Mario: Thank you. So long a Bowser.  
  
Bowser: Right. See you.  
  
(Mario moves to the development room, which is about 10 miles across. It is so big Mario needed a golf buggy, which was conveniently next to him to get across, and so he drove to the lifts. On the way you see Tails building five Sonics before Mario gets to the lifts. When Mario gets into the lift and goes up, Aqua teleports into the development room.)  
  
Aqua: Hey Tails take a break.  
  
Tails: I can't.  
  
Aqua: You've finished.  
  
Tails: Nearly.  
  
Aqua: Well, continue after the forum.  
  
Tails: Okay.  
  
Aqua:(Presses the call lift button.) Rats. No lifts. Oh well.  
  
(Aqua disappears and then reappears with lots of spikes in the formation Sonic has them except he has some on his arms too. He had transformed into Speed Aqua.)  
  
Speed Aqua: Got to go. Bye (Sprints off to the stairs at the speed of sound.)  
  
(Tails finds another lift and rides upstairs.)  
  
(Scene: Second Floor Boardrooms. Speed Aqua stops sprinting and de- transforms. Tails calmly walks out of the lifts.)  
  
Tails: Aqua, where are we supposed to be going?  
  
Aqua: In the main board, room 18.  
  
Tails: Let's go then.  
  
(They start walking to the board. On the way they see a sign saying Social board and stop.)  
  
Aqua: That is the social board. The topic of the day is: Who Wants Rouge's Keys?  
  
Tails: (Sweat drop) Aqua?  
  
Aqua: Yes?  
  
Tails: What is a message board?  
  
Aqua: It's an electronic board where people can say what they feel about a certain topic or game...  
  
Tails: Game?  
  
Aqua: Yeah. We are an entertainment for higher beings and I'm just a personification of a username.  
  
Tails: So do we exist? (Feels himself to make sure.)  
  
Aqua: In this world, yes.  
  
Tails: Right. We should get going.  
  
Aqua: Yeah.  
  
(They then walk through another door into a vast room about a quarter the size of the development room. There are a lot of doors around.)  
  
Aqua: This is the main forum room. Room 18 is over there. (He points to a door as he and Tails walk to it.)  
  
Tails: That's our forum.  
  
(They walk in and sit at a huge table with Mario, Sonic, Knuckles, Shadow, Bowser, Peach, Luigi, Link, Mr. Game And Watch, Donkey Kong, Captain Falcon and Fox McCloud.)  
  
Mario: What is this forum about?  
  
Sonic: It is a violent row about which is better- Velcro or Shoelaces.  
  
Mario: (Begins to write something) How is this for a name. (Shows board) War of the Shoes- Velcro Vs Laces.  
  
All: We like it!  
  
Mario: Let the opening statements commence!  
  
Sonic: I say Velcro is best!  
  
Shadow: Agreed!  
  
Link: Speak for yourself Shadow! You wear big cases of metal on your shoes.  
  
Mr. G+W: Objection! Irrelevant!  
  
Mario: Sustained!  
  
Tails: Shoelaces help you run quicker so that's why I like them.  
  
Bowser: I agree about liking them, but I like them because stupid heroes trip up so I can catch them.  
  
Knuckles: I've never heard anything so low! Shoelaces stink period!!  
  
Bowser: Speak for yourself stupid! You wear them!  
  
Knuckles: Why you little.  
  
Bowser: Big.  
  
Fox: This is going to get messy. (Gets blaster out and hides under table)  
  
(Fox was right. Knuckles growled and dived at Bowser who swiped Knuckles away. Knuckles then dived at Bowser again and they get involved in a brutal fistfight.)  
  
C. Falcon: I'm getting out of here! (Gets out a remote control and dives out of the window and jumps down the stairs to where his F-Zero racer the Blue Falcon was waiting.)  
  
Mario: Coward.  
  
(Aqua also runs out, but doesn't get far before Metal Sonic Mark 2, Matrix Sonic, Karate Sonic, Jet Sonic and Cool Sonic block his way.)  
  
Sonic: (Messing around with a remote control) I've got you now with my clones Aqua!! Mhhuuuaaaaahhhhhhha!!!!  
  
(Mario then puts a berretta to Sonic's head.)  
  
Mario: I think not.  
  
Fox: I've got you covered Sir. (Crouching behind table with blaster aimed at Sonic's head.)  
  
(By now everyone has fled and Knuckles knocked Bowser through the wall and fled.)  
  
Mario: Call off the robots.  
  
Sonic: No (Swipes gun away from his head)  
  
(Fox fires at Sonic, but hits the gun which then falls to the floor. Sonic jumps through the wall and dashes after Aqua. Aqua steps back after seeing the Metal Sonics, looks behind and sees Sonic behind him with dual ZMG 9mm Uzi's. Aqua shines with a dull light and reappears with two large sky blue wings. He became Ultimate God Aqua.)  
  
U God Aqua: Anyone dare to challenge Ultimate God Aqua?  
  
Sonic: Yes!!!!!! (Fires at U G Aqua) (U G Aqua closed his wings and all the bullets bounced off.)  
  
Mario: (Sweat Drop)  
  
Sonic: Whaaaaaaa!!!!!!!  
  
U G Aqua: My turn now. SHADOW BLADE!!!!!  
  
(U G Aqua slashed at the air and a blade of darkness struck Sonic and sent him flying towards the wall, taking out a large part of it. Mario is talking to someone on a mobile phone.)  
  
Mario: Send three squads and hurry!  
  
Sonic: (Gasps) I'm in deep trouble! But I still have the metal Sonics! Attack! (All the metal Sonics enter attack mode and charge at U G Aqua. U G Aqua sticks his hand out and the Metal Sonics freeze in place and short circuit. Just as that happens, an army of koopa troopers armed with laser blasters run up the stairs and set formation near the frozen metal Sonics.)  
  
Sonic: Oh crud! (Presses a big red button on the same remote)  
  
U G Aqua: Watch it! They're going to blow!  
  
(All five Metal Sonics explode, sending the koopas flying down the stairs. Tails hovers up on the Cyclone.)  
  
Tails: Hurry Sonic! Onto the Cyclone!  
  
U G Aqua: Oh no you don't! (Sticks out his hand again.)  
  
Tails: W-w-whats happening?! (The Cyclone's control panel shows a "Blue screen of death" well known to Windows 95/98 users) Not a crash on my combat system?! (Starts to fall) AAAAAAhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!  
  
Mario: Get him.  
  
(A group of Koopas surround Tails and engaged in capture procedures. One word: Ouch. Anyway, knuckles is captured as well and Sonic is next.) To Be Continued 


End file.
